Dr Sue Roffey

Every parent wants the best for their child. But many parents today, in all sectors of society, seem to have lost their way and are no longer sure what ‘the best’ means. They have bought into a set of expectations which do not necessarily meet either children’s emotional needs or their own. These expectations result in giving a child things rather than time, experiences to enhance their formal learning rather than their imagination or sense of fun. Such expectations foster competition rather than sharing, promote activities which foster aggression rather than empathy and try to shape children into what adults want them to be rather than valuing each child for themselves and encouraging their unique potential.

We, ‘the experts’, now know a good deal about optimum parenting styles and what sorts of relationships and experiences have the best outcomes for children. We know about the importance of ‘attachment’ and that babies need to bond with their mothers. There is increasing evidence that emotional nurturing is essential for effective learning as well as for psychological well being, and there is much research to indicate that ‘appropriate’ behaviour depends on good role models and positive teaching.

Lyn has reflected deeply on her own experiences with her two small daughters and in Intuitive Mothering; shares how her understanding of her role as a mother has developed as a result. She is not a psychologist but a parent, not an ‘expert’ but a ‘practitioner’.

What is extraordinary about Intuitive Mothering; is that it puts vibrant life into the theory of good practice. Lyn not only suggests what to do but how to do it so that both child and mother experience great pleasure in those precious early years. She brings a warm and responsive framework onto the challenges and possibilities of parenting. In doing so Lyn questions many assumptions and brings us back to the roots of how we need to parent so that both children and mothers are equipped with self confidence, humanity and a joy in being alive.

Intuitive Mothering brings us back to the most basic of basics. It is about how to ‘tune into’ a mother’s instinctive knowledge about what her child needs. It is about how to use this ‘inner knowing’ to respond sensitively and appropriately to a range of parenting issues. In doing so it also releases mothers from the many ‘distractions’ of ‘oughts’ and misguided goals. It does not offer ‘soft’ options but helps to establish age appropriate developmental goals in ways that maintain good relationships and a sense of self-efficacy for both mother and child.

Intuitive Mothering is a valuable resource for anyone who really wants to have the best possible experience as a mother and to give their child the best possible start in life.

I believe Intuitive Mothering will make a significant contribution to parenting literature.

Dr. Suzanne (Sue) Roffey
B.Sc. (Hons) P.G.C.E, M. Sc, Special Ed. M. Sc Ed. Psych, Doc. Ed. Psy., Member of the Australian Psychological and British Psychological Societies, Registered NSW Psychologist, Senior Lecturer in Educational Psychology, University of Western Sydney.